Healing from depression

I also wanted to tell you that I went back to my waterfall paradise to see D. She’s gonna be ok. It’s amazing to see how many people who end up here didn’t share their innermost feelings with the people who were close to them and could have helped them. I can see so clearly what a trick of the devil that is, and where his power lies, and the strategy the demons of death use on us young people. It’s almost always the same pattern. Reassure everyone, be secretive, shame about what you’re going through. Like with me the doctor said I was ashamed of my sickness, but it wasn’t just my sickness. I was also ashamed of my depression and tried to hide it and put on a bold front, which fooled just about everyone. Or even if you were worried about me, you didn’t have a hint that I would resort to something like that. It was the same for D., although she wasn’t sick with anything, but she was sick with life. She was being plagued by unseen torment, by deep depression, the kind that makes you feel you are in a black hole and can never pull out. But she didn’t tell anyone. How could she? She had everything going for her, she was successful, she didn’t think anyone would understand what she was going through, she was afraid her loved ones would either make fun of her, or tell her it wasn’t true, but to her it was so real and so dark she just couldn’t pull out of it. So she put an end to it all. She also knew she would come to Heaven. She knew Jesus would forgive her and would take her in. She didn’t think about the consequences on her loved ones, on her family. She thought, like me, that it was the best choice for everyone, that it would spare them having to find out that she was suffering from depression and that it may hurt her future carrier, or her competition. She was afraid to disappoint them, so the spirits of death convinced her to end it all. But Jesus won in the end, ‘cause she’s safe in His arms now. She just needs time to heal, and then she’ll be ok. Jesus will use anyone. He needs us, both on earth and in heaven, to accomplish His purpose, His mission. So she’s not lost. But it’s hard for her of course to see how sad her family is. She definitely wants her family to know that she’s fine, that she’s sorry to have caused them so much pain, that she didn’t mean to. That she was trying to spare them from having to discover she was suffering from depression. That she didn’t realize it would be a lot worse. But the thing they need to understand, is that depression does that to you, and it’s all the work of the spirits of death, to persuade the person who’s depressed that ending it all is the loving thing to do, is the most selfless thing to do, it is to spare your loved ones the pain of having to cure someone who is mentally ill. So that the person feels it is their only choice, and it is the best choice, the most selfless choice, out of love for their family. Even if suicide is totally contrary to a person’s personality, even if they never talked about it before, that is what depression can do to someone, and it’s perpetrated by the devil and the spirits of death that are under his command. Oh one more thing, she wanted me to pass on to her family that the Lord was with her each step of the way, that he had sent an angel to hold her when she passed away and to bring her to Him, and she was so overwhelmed by the love and forgiveness He flooded upon her that she couldn’t even describe it. But I knew exactly what she meant. In any case, she mainly wants her family to stop grieving over her and to stop blaming themselves. She wants them to know that it’s nothing any of them has done, that she loves them all, that they’ve been wonderful with her, and she wants them to know that she’s ok, she’s happy now, her depression is gone and she’s on her way to recovery. She is receiving healing now in the waterfall of the Lord’s love and she will try to communicate with them when she feels ready.