The butterfly

(Every since she was a little girl, Natalie has always loved butterflies. When Jerry’s “Butterfly” song came out, it became her favorite. At the time, I thought she didn’t realize what the song was really about, but maybe she did and this song was an early comfort to her for what would happen years later. For her 8^th birthday, it had to be a butterfly cake and I had to make her a butterfly outfit for the “Little Creature” party we organized. 

The last entry in her diary, hours before she passed away, was the words to the same “Butterfly” song. A couple years before, while in Congo, she wrote about the comfort a certain butterfly on our balcony brought to her when it landed on her hand, and she took pictures of it. So since she went to Heaven, butterflies always remind us of her and help us feel her presence. They also remind us that one day, we will all shed our earthly cocoon and fly off to Heaven.

When living in Congo, Natie had created a party business, for which I still receive calls from time to time. 

Last night was one of those occasions, and I felt her presence while painting the children’s faces. At the end of the evening, as I was packing up to leave, I noticed on the window right behind me a single butterfly inside the building where the party was held. It rested on the window sill right above my shoulder. It was identical to the one that had comforted her years ago by landing on her hand. So I also extended my hand towards it. The little butterfly crept on my fingers and remained there. I walked around with it resting in the palm of my hand. It never budged or attempted to fly away, until one of the children came by and tried touching it. Then it flew away. I don’t know how Natie managed that one, she must have asked the Lord to make it all happen just for my sake, to comfort my heart in the same way that little butterfly had comforted her. To me, there is no doubt that it was a very tangible yet extraordinary manifestation of her presence, and of her love for me. It was actually the very first time in my life that a butterfly willingly climbed on my fingers and remained in my hand for such a long time.)

16/03/14 Mom, I want to tell you that it makes me real happy when I can manifest my love to you like I did yesterday. Lots of time, you don’t see me (well obviously) you don’t feel my presence, even when I’m there. Sometimes it’s fun to play invisible, but other times I really want you to know I’m there! So the Lord works it out and talks to butterflies. It’s something I’d like to learn to do actually, to talk to butterflies. Some animals are easier to communicate with than humans. Here’s another art I need to learn! I think you’d be real good at it, Mom, ‘cause you have a real love for animals. But it’s ok, I can start with butterflies, ‘cause they remind you of me. (just then a butterfly flew on our balcony)

Kate Kerr

16/3/14 Me: what about this Kate Kerr, is it someone I should check out and look into? Or not necessary? Do you know her?

Natalie: Not really. I know there are a certain number of people on earth who have had experiences, spiritual experiences and encounters with Heaven. I know the Lord does want His message to be preached. I also feel the very strong desire to communicate that knowledge of Heaven, to help mortals understand and to encourage people’s faith. It also seems to me the most important mission there is, to tell people about Jesus, about Salvation, about Heaven. And for us who are already in Heaven, to strive to communicate that knowledge. Time is ticking away, and there is real advantage to know about Heaven and to get saved now, before Jesus comes back. It’s amazing to me actually how many testimonies there are, how many experiences mortals have had that totally prove the existence of God and of Heaven, but still people will not believe. But some do. So we need to keep preaching, keep spreading the message.

Meeting Phoebz and Richard

9/03/14 I get to see pretty much as much as I want of your life, I get to partake of it much more than before, I get to see your beautiful, thoughtful, loving heart. I have to make an effort still not to regret certain things, but the Lord understands when I do and I know He’s forgiven me. Wow, I’m also realizing how much you had to forgive us kids for. It’s funny isn’t it, when we’re kids, we expect so much of our parents, and we think they owe us so much, not realizing how much pain we cause them at time. It’s certainly helping me to have a much broader perspective and much better appreciation of you guys.

I got to meet Phoebe you know. She’s fun, I like her. She’s helped me a lot actually. At first it was hard for me to relate to her, I looked at her like such a hero who went through so much and just waited for the Lord to take her. But she came out to find me and we had a great talk and she was so sweet. She was so humble! She told me how she didn’t really have a choice in the matter, and she doesn’t know what she’d have done if she was in my shoes. The Lord’s forgiven me and I know He fully understands me to the depth of my soul and He’s healed me completely now. But when I meet others like Pheebz I get hit. But now I’m ok and we’re good friends.

 I went to see Richard also who came recently. He’s gonna be ok. His story is a bit different. We’re all helping each other, it’s neat. The Lord’s love is so amazing. The devil thought he’d won when he took our lives, but the Lord won! The devil can’t touch us. And our parents’ testimony is so, so powerful. I don’t think you can realize that fully now, Mom, but your testimony is very powerful and the devil is real mad about it, ‘cause it totally defeats him. I love you Mommy. I just want to hold and hug you and love you all the time. I would like for my love to uphold you, to cheer you up, to make things all better.